Seagreen blues

I'd heard about it, in fact it seemed everyone I met was talking about it...

Seagreen, seagreen, seagreen...

"The fabulous Luxury lifestyle emporium Seagreen brings a unique shopping experience to Dublin focusing on a comfortable and relaxed atmosphere with a distinctive range of inspired products"... thats how they describe themselves online, and then I saw tv3s Xpose where they visited the shop and spoke about the amazing goods for sale and the relaxing atmosphere of their stunning cafe. I was sure this was finally a place to rival Avoca and I was looking forward to checking out the competition!

So when dear C suggested we ditch Avoca for Seagreen for our usual "coffee and browse" session I jumped at the chance. I was so excited... I imagined a place full of calm and beauty, with seascape walls and inspired displays, I expected to be romanced, courted and deflowered of my senses, I wanted Seagrass to taunt me, haunt me... touch taste smell... I wanted it all...

I didn't get it...

I was so disappointed I could have lain on the floor and wailed. The huge wave of excitement decreased as we walked through the door and became nothing but a puppy licking at my toes, and then turning away and going asleep... First there was no inspirational displays, just things for sale on top of other things for sale. A poor mans Avoca handweavers at twice the price, frankly Dunnes Stores dress their homewares better than this. Nothing called, nothing waved, nothing shouted at me "You NEED me!" There was an overall air of 'nothingness' about this place.

As we continued and went to have our coffee I began to notice other huge faults, in my book - local artists work for sale on the walls of the cafe (I hate that because its nearly always rubbish), the floors were dirty and needed a sweep, in the courtyard where we sat for our coffee the tables were dirty and the ground was mucky. We ordered two breakfast dishes, I got the scrambled eggs and dear C got the fruit with yoghurt. Both came on plates and did not kill us. That is the most I can say. For the price, I would have expected a bit of embellishment, not even a sprig of parsley on my eggs and C's yoghurt had (I saw it being done as I paid) been poured straight from a carton into the bowl so it was just plop with fruit, which I thought was a bit sloppy. Compared with what you could get in Avoca for the price (see here), it was very disappointing. The taste was good, in that it wasn't bad, but C did say the fruit was excellent and the honey delicious. The price did not rival the competition and my goodness they aren't in the race when it comes to the food. As a lst ditch attempt at getting what I'd come for I ordered a slice of fruit and yoghurt cake, which I instantly renamed as "what fruit and bland cake". While I was waiting to pay, wondering where to put my purse down on a counter covered in spilt milk, I noticed the kitchen staff preparing a breakfast for another customer. The bagel was hurredly sliced, unevenly, and thrown into a toaster. Smoked salmon was plopped onto a plate and a thin lemon slice was thrown on. Then the slightly burned bagel was added and the waitress took it away. I got the impression that all of the goods had been bought in, nothing made on site, and that the staff had little enthusiasm for presentation.

Don't get me wrong, all of these things are absolutely acceptable in regular little cafes and coffee shops, however, given the selling point of Seagreen seems to be that it is an oasis, a haven, a sanctuary, it needs to raise the bar. The clothes and items in Seagreen are high end, expensive (think 1 dress €549) and aimed at the yummy mummy crowd, and yet it lacked thought, inspiration and care. Some of the items were absolute gems, yet lost in insipid display and bad design. A little dote of a childs desk stood alone facing the wall on the way out, missed if not looked for, only seen by chance by dear C who stopped to fix her buggy on the way out. Someone with a bit of imagination would have dressed that desk, with childrens shoes and pretty pencils, all placed on a stand - the top of the desk at eye level.

Seagreen? The only thing I liked about this place is the name...